Showing posts with label addiction. Show all posts
Showing posts with label addiction. Show all posts

Monday, March 2, 2015

The Deadly Price of Anonymity- Celebrate Recovery

Addiction: a cancer in society.  Without long term support it will decimate us.


A very dear friend of mine is recovered from a year long battle with cancer.  It was life threatening. It was a sudden diagnosis and it toppled her world.  Life and the importance of her career, her activities, and relationship struggles all shifted. The mundane became important and the important became mundane.

After the treatments were over, her body cleared of the cancer she was still embraced in the process of recovery.  The center continued to provide support; meditation, nutritional counseling, yoga and movement classes,  talk therapy and medical follow-up.  This will be available for as long as she needs it.  This fatal illness garners respect even in remission.  There is no shame in returning to the cancer care center as many times a week as she is interested and able.  There is no shame in being a woman recovering from cancer.  Her experience with the profound change in her world view, some might call a spiritual experience, is accepted and lauded.  This after care is an accepted way to heal and a way to participate in the process of prevention: nutrition, stress management, movement, support and care.

The care and compassion expressed for my friend is universal; friends, family, co-workers have sympathy or empathy for her journey.  Both in illness and in recovery there is understanding.  Work colleagues make space for time restrictions, activity restrictions.  Only the sense for personal privacy limits what others know.  There is no shame in having cancer, there is no guilt inherent in this disease.

Now I think about myself and my friends.  We are in recovery from a fatal illness: drug and alcohol addiction.  Gambling, sex, food, relationships, debt - all forms of addiction that can lead to jail, illness or death.  They can lead to the stress illnesses that can contribute to diseases like cancer. Due to anonymity we can only express pride and share tools for continued recovery among our ranks. Our bosses, people we work with, sometimes family members are not privy to the disease nor to the recovery.  We are invisible - we live in silence.

When first (self) diagnosed we may have been involved in formal treatment- lasting for a specific period of time- usually 28 days. It is not necessarily holistic.  Nutrition and physical health may not be addressed.  There are few standard efficacious protocols.  Quality and care vary from place to place.  Aftercare is a luxury.  And all this available only to those who can pay or who are mandated from the courts.  A large number of people get no formalized care; they come to recovery on their own. they maintain on their own.

Anonymity perpetuates shame.
Anonymity perpetuates shame for having the disease and it perpetuates the assumption of relapse. "Don't tell anyone because you might "go out" again, you might slip, you might relapse."  There is little formal aftercare. Unless pursued on one's own there are no meditation classes, nutritional counseling, movement therapies available to help the recovering addict balance life and the life they are leaving.  One cannot assume that bosses and co-workers will sympatheticly provide moral and actual support.  In many circumstances the workplace must remain ignorant of the struggle: one's job security could be impaired.

The challenges of redefining yourself, your goals and dreams, of creating a new way of life are not supported by society at large- they are supported by fellow sufferers.  Thank goodness for that; but it is not comprehensive.

Anonymity prevents celebration.  Society focuses on those in active disease or relapse.  We are only able to celebrate the success of continued recovery amongst ourselves.  The news capitalizes on the fallen but does not celebrate the many victors in the battle against addiction.  Politicians seldom state they are twenty five years sober, but they have "battled cancer".  (THANK YOU Michael Botticelli for being public about your recovery.)You aren't going to hear of suprvisors or co-workers share their first year of recovery as they might being one year cancer free.  We don't see the oceans of people enjoying continuous recovery. And they are there!

That brings me to the celebration  of recovery. Breaking anonymity bravely and publicly helps all. February 26th was the Sixth (yes there were five others) Experience Strength and Hope awards.  Joey Pantoliano was honored this year for his courage, honesty and compassion and work in addiction recovery.  Artists and musicians are finding their way to the stage of openness and candor and that is tremendous.  We need voices in all walks of life, we need the struggles acknowledged and the stigma removed.

Stand up for your recovery.  Lets expand treatment to include post acute care and decrease the probability for relapse.  Decreasing shame may increase visibility and we need the road to recovery well embraced.  There is a heroin crises in this country.  We need to prepare for a new wave of healing to overcome the impact of that disaster; the overdose and overdose deaths. We have to come out of the shadows and bring long term healing modalities into effective and common use.

Shout outs to those who are making a difference:

To Vermont for accelerating recovery resources http://preview.tinyurl.com/mtvoxpj [Open in new window]

 To students making a difference: http://preview.tinyurl.com/npd9lj8



And to our new Director of the National Drug Control Policy with 26 years of Recovery
http://preview.tinyurl.com/aghn6x7




Kyczy Hawk E-RYT200, RTY500
 is the author of "Yoga and the Twelve Step Path" .
In The Rooms  sponsors an online Yoga and Recovery meeting Sunday 7am PST.  Log in and join her there.
She leads two Y12SR, yoga of twelve step recovery, classes a week for the public at Willow Glen Yoga in San Jose. Kyczy is the creator of SOAR(tm) (Success Over Addiction and Relapse) intructing teachers about the unique needs of the recovery population. This certification training now available in an ONLINE study course.  http://www.yogarecovery.com/SOAR__tm__Cert_all.html 

Check out her ONLINE RECOVERY INFUSED YOGA CLASSES: 


Sunday, September 9, 2012

Breaking the Cycles

I am honored to be a guest blogger at Breaking the Cycles. Please click here to read what I wrote. Breaking the Cycles has been sharing research, information, personal experiences and opinions on these topics such as drug addiction, alcoholism, substance abuse, dual diagnosis, underage drinking, help for families, prevention, treatment, recovery and the neuroscience of the brain disease and brain health and more since 2008. Their goal is to change, and in some cases simply start, the conversations so together we can end the stigma, misinformation and shame. They do this through presentations, workshops, consulting, blogging and media outreach. Cruise on over to their website and see what other information you can find.

Thursday, June 21, 2012

Avoiding Relapse of Every Stripe

Yes – I can relapse – not my substance addiction but my emotional sobriety. How does this happen? How “unlovely” can I BE! What can I do to prevent it?

Some event occurs. I come into it feeling vulnerable: insecure, unsure, fearful or uncared for. A conversation commences and does not go well. And I snap. I am not able to “take” it. What ever “it” isloud talk, hasty words, uncaring speech or even a disappointing outcome. This can be a conversation with a vendor, a service person or someone who is in calling to advise me about a plan. What ever the conversation is about there is something disappointing. I find myself out of balance and that leaks out all over the interchange. First I become strident, then I shut down. We conclude the discussion and I hang up.

But that isn’t the end of it. I go on to ruminate and disturb my current moments with the memories of that unpleasant conversation. These memories are enhanced by stories from the past, fertilized and nurtured by hurt and resentment. Now they have grown from fledgling discomfort to a full-grown jungle of negative emotions. Then "generosity" appears and I feel compelled to share this experience with others, over and over, letting their concern and sympathy fan the flames of my bitterness. I then move into self-righteous angera deadly intoxicant for this person in recovery – and the “slip” is complete. I have fallen off the maturity and spiritual wellness wagon. I am now on my back in the mud, wiggling around, searching for the foothold of composure and wellness. I yearn to walk upright in peace; body, mind and spirit integrated in one unified whole of compassion for self and others. And, yes, the suffering comes because I am TOO WELL to be THAT SICK anymore.

 I can be pretty unlovely, mewling in my pain and frustrated in my inability to overcome it. And the answer comes, as they often do, in the sharing of another. Don’t resist, experience. Allow the feelings to be, without the story, without justification, defense or even denial. Sit with it and let it pass. And stop “sharing the wealth” of disdain and distress. Yes, I have been taking my own poison.


And today I choose to stop. I avoid relapse of my primary addictions by sticking with my program of recovery. I avoid relapse of an uncaring attitude toward my body,mind and spirit unity by practicing all the forms of yoga. I practice keeping my spirit in good health with meditation. And, yet, I am still human and can relapse in my emotional "sobriety".  How can I avoid this? I go back to the principles of yoga and recovery.  Will that prevent them for good and all? I don't know – but I do know the periods or relapse are shorter, the anguish less severe and less perseverant, and yes, I do eventually remember to sit. Sit it through don’t sit it out.

Kyczy Hawk E-RYT200, RTY500 is the author of "Yoga and the Twelve Step Path" ans "Life in Bite Sized Morsels", a leader of Y12SR classes, and the creator of SOAR(tm) (Success Over Addiction and Relapse) a teacher certification training. 


Follow her ONLINE recovery infused yoga classes 
http://yogarecovery.studiolivetv.com/MemberRegistrationYR.aspx

Sunday, April 22, 2012

Gratitude Fills My Heart

THREE YEARS AGO THIS HAPPENED

A short note with a BIG THANK YOU to Rob and Angie of our local recovery bookstore; All About Recovery. They hosted a wonderful book signing for me to welcome my book "Yoga and The Twelve Step Path" into the world.

Now, again, All About Recovery is holding a grand RE-Opening of the store August 15th, 2015 from 11am to 3pm. There will be a celebration with food prizes and at 1pm I will be signing my NEW BOOK "Life in Bite Sized Morsels- Learning to Live Life on Life's Terms".


This is how it unfolded in 2012: 

I arrived early to see if I needed to do anything to help prepare and to find out what the process would be. They had everything under control: coffee hot and water cool for the event. Even a popcorn machine was out and ready, giving the space a festival feel.

 As an extra added attraction their daughter in law was set up to do chair massage. I was the first one to take advantage of this offer - and she gave me the most wonderful massage - gratis - effectively petting all my fur into the right direction. I calmed down, got centered, used my breath and - well not quite relaxed - but moved into the moment. As I was draped over the chair I heard the first person come in asking about the signing and the book. It is really happening.

Even before 2pm folks were coming in. Friends brought snacks, they chatted and walked around the store. They bought cards, CDs and books. I was able to witness the interconnectedness of people in the area - folks who knew each other unbeknownst to me. With the conversational buzz and greetings shouted across the room, and general feeling of excitement; it was a PARTY! Seated at a table in the back of the lovely air conditioned shop I was able to spend a few minutes with each person who came. That made it even better than a party where you really don't get to SEE everyone who comes because you are dashing about.

At this celebration I got moments with each person. I saw people who had driven quite a distance, people I hadn't seen in years, and people who were an unexpected surprise. At 5pm, an hour after the signing was to have been done, I grabbed a treat from the snack table and wandered off to my truck and home, exhausted but delighted. I thank you all! I am so grateful, Namaste.

Kyczy Hawk E-RYT200, RTY500 is the author of "Yoga and the Twelve Step Path" ans "Life in Bite Sized Morsels", a leader of Y12SR classes, and the creator of SOAR(tm) (Success Over Addiction and Relapse) a teacher certification training. 


Follow her ONLINE recovery infused yoga classes 
http://yogarecovery.studiolivetv.com/MemberRegistrationYR.aspx

Saturday, November 5, 2011

A Heart Cracked Open

I Love It - For Real, for real.

I am going to take several days to integrate what I discovered and learned (which are quite different things) at the Yoga and Addiction Recovery Conference at Esalen this past week. Nikki Myers, Rolf Gates, Vinnie Marino, Noah Levine, Carrie Coppola and Tommy Rosen all shared with a generosity of spirit, an authenticity and availability that touched me deeply. Among the intense experience of somatic release, meditation, 12 Step sharing and dharma talks my mind, body, spirit and emotions found corners of my heart. These areas had been long protected. I let them emerge without having to analyze or explain why they had been hidden. This abrupt awakening left me with a heart cracked open. I felt this with my body in the form of tears, in my emotions as a sense of increased vulnerability followed by a sense of alertness and aliveness, and in my spirit with renewed love and affection for both myself and others. Yes, for myself and others. Both. What a gift.

Stay tuned for more.

In the meantime my article on the breath was published in the Dynamic Living Magazine. Click here for more!

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Ask Kyczy about Yoga and Recovery; Brahmacharya - Non-excess

Yogic Yama - Restraint
Brahmacharya used to be translated as celibacy but now is more accurately defined as non-excess as it refers to all facets and characteristics of our being. It refers to all our passions and our desires. It can refer to time spent, money spent, and energy spent: to excess.  It can refer also to the velcro attitude in relationships and all the ways we can over do things.



The disease of MORE
Doing; doing doing doing – we are always doing something. The more we have to do the “better” we are. The more impossible our schedules the more valuable we are in this over indulging society. Free time is not only a fantasy for most – we don’t know what NOT to do with it when we have it.



Wall off the spirit; find the door
Another danger of excess it that overindulgence can be a mask, a thick goo of someTHING that covers a true need and blocks the spirit.  Food, things, sex, time; we find a way to over use and justify our excesses. Then to top it all off – I am an ADDICT! As an addict (and in my less than healthy state) there is NEVER such as thing as too much – so non-excess doesn’t make sense to me. Then there is my recovering self; that self that does not want ever to return to the madness of “too much of a good thing is a good thing” where good is relative.

With that desire for recovery Brahmacharya become one of my restraints.  So I keep Brahmacharya in mind when I work with my recovery and work with my yoga practice and when I work with my life.
With the help of others and with a sponsor / mentor the core of the issue can be revealed and resolved. This is the core of step work and the core of yoga practice.
Finding the point of enough, the grace of sufficiency, the divine in needing what I have and having what I need – that is my practice. That is my struggle and it is my reward.

Kyczy Hawk E-RYT200, RTY500 is the author of "Yoga and the Twelve Step Path", a leader of Y12SR classes, and the creator of SOAR(tm) (Success Over Addiction and Relapse) a teacher certification training that she holds with her good friend Kent Bond E-RYT500. Find out more about her, her classes and the training at www.yogarecovery.comhttp://www.yogarecovery.com